day ONE THOUSAND ONE HUNDRED and TWENTY FIVE

Lower the Lifeboats

Write down who you are.

That was what we were told to do

so that in the future we would remember.

Write down what you value

your hopes for your children

Write a list of things you would never do

Because it’s possible in this new

bleak

landscape

that you will do them.

Know who you are. Know what you believe.

know how you fight and how you run.

And now, four years later,

aging and anxious

I pace the floorboards of my small apartment

picking up memories,

holding them like moths in my cupped hands

asking them if they are okay

Are we okay? Are we still okay?

I text people that I love just to tell them I love them

over and over again

as if that will make some difference

as if the flood waters outside

brackish and black

have not been rising for years now

as if they are not lapping against the walls

as if my hands alone could hold back the waves

or stop the bleeding

that pumps with each heartbeat

as if they could save even one precious life

as if we could ferry ourselves out of this darkness

find new land

lower the lifeboats

and sail away

--Ally Malinenko