poem of the day 10.30.13

simon

simon’s mother starts yelling at him

the second they get on the bus at bay parkway

because the kid races to the back on his toddler feet
and starts climbing the row of seats

simon is maybe two, maybe he’s over two now

he’s kicking at a man who’s trying to read the post

the old guy is smiling at simon

but you can tell that he’s pissed because his face is red

and he keeps trying to move further away in his seat

simon’s mother thinks this is funny

she laughs as simon starts scaling poles

she laughs as he squeals and shouts and stomps

she looks around at the rest of us for confirmation

to prove that simon is as endearing as she thinks he is

some people would call a child like this precocious

but they’d be wrong

because precocious denotes intelligence, being clever, gifted

simon is a moron and you can tell it

by the way his slobber hits the bum-piss-stained floor of the bus

i hate children like this

they are road blocks on the path of my peaceful existence

kids like simon should be chained in backyards

or made to wear one of those baby leashes that you used to see

but simon’s mother is liberal with her child

she doesn’t care that he’s still kicking at the old guy

or stumbling around trying to knock over my beam bottle

maybe simon’s mother is just tired

i’d be if i had to put up with this kid

i look at her and i think, yeah, she’s tired and done

and she’s letting simon be our problem for a little while

the chick is young too

she doesn’t even look thirty yet

i should feel bad for her for having a kid like this

for wasting some good years shouting his boutique baby name

carrying his stroller and nursing bag on brooklyn buses

but i don’t

it’s not my fault that something was missing in her life

that she needed to create simon

infest this bus with a simon

plague the world with a simon

who squeals and cries and screams and kicks old men

i can’t empathize with a woman like that

in truth, i’d like to see her reach her end and lash out at simon

give him a good whack on the ass

the way simon’s got it back in my day

but instead she reaches for the child and tries

to coddle him like he’s a teddy bear

of course simon screams at being captured this way

he worms out of his mom’s arms and falls to the stained floor

he reaches for my booze bag but i snatch it away in time

i try not to be too cross because simon’s mother

is giving me a dumb, red-faced, apologetic smile

as simon gets up and goes careening down the aisle

face forward when the bus hits a red light

another old man tries to reach for the kid to brace him

but simon screams at him and slides like pete rose

his mother has no choice but to get up

cumbersome stroller and thick nursing bag in her arms

she reaches simon but he runs away

he’s heading toward the front of the bus

where the driver sits protected by a pane of unbreakable glass

as blissful and ignorant of this kid

as a fat buddha daydreaming under a bodhi tree.