poem of the day 04.20.15

emmylou harris

when i turned thirty

i told my wife

when i turn forty

i’m going to start a punk band

with some old warriors

with teenagers and kids in their twenties

we’ll be the fuckheads

last night she reminded me

that was eleven years ago

i told her time flies like time flies

plus kids in their teens and twenties

are dull substitutes for humanity

they know everything

and they know nothing

they always have their heads buried

in some device made in china

plus i always hated punk music

and i never learned how to play guitar

but would if i could now

i wouldn’t start a band

the idea of collaboration is so foreign to me

i’d just want a bunch of yes men around

to carry out my ideas

my each and every whim

or maybe i’d go it completely alone

record my old man jingles on a computer

give emmylou harris a call

and have her sing background for me

like she did for dylan and neil

and practically everyone else

old emmylou has to be pushing seventy now

but i’ll bet her voice is like a fine wine

more refined than

some twentysomethings

who’d spend their breaks in the recording sessions

smoking e-cigarettes and texting

looking up videos

of people cracking each other in the nuts

instead of coming outside

to get high behind the trash bins

with the rest of the fuckheads

in the band.

and here's an old marijuana poem for you, dipshit, wherever you are:

the reluctant pot head

we told calvin that

phillies blunt cigars

came pre-made with marijuana

just like all the rappers smoked

he didn’t bat an eye

when we bought a pack

and lit them in his car

as we drove around suburban pittsburgh

listening to a 2pac cd

and when calvin finished his cigar

and acted fucked up

we acted fucked up too

because no one had the heart to tell him

that you couldn’t buy pot

over the counter in america

besides he was a natural born citizen

and none of us thought he’d believe us anyway

about the cigars

but when calvin said that he was

coming down from his high

we all acted like we were coming down too

and later on when one of us said,

dude, would you like another smoke?

we all understood it when calvin said,

nah, i don’t want to become an addict

all in one night.

                                    07.02.13