nineteen
i just wanted to go back to bed
all of the time
smoke cigarettes
smoke pussy….if i could get it
drink my old man’s beer when he wasn’t around
i wanted to leave where i was for greener pastures
that were most likely another mirage
oh, how i enjoyed my depression
the ones now are like little businessmen
they barely have a dull moment carved into their lives
or when they do they’re bored
they call themselves writers and artists freely
have grand business schemes worked out
are best friends with their parents
don’t drink
don’t smoke
let their peer group live their examined lives for them
as they enjoy the monotony of the work day a little too well
and they’re always smiling too
maybe it’s the corn syrup and internet access
the fear of an unwinding climate in the back of their heads
but back then i was unmotivated and happily so
you couldn’t tell me anything and you still can’t
i could kill days staring at walls
and doing little else
i hated going to a job
almost as much as i do now
man, i excelled at being indolent
to me, these kids today are aliens
they’re excitable corporate larvae
dancing in front of security cameras omnipotent
letting the whole world know where they are
all of the time
completely without the knowledge of how to get lost
how to disappear completely
on any random afternoon.
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