lady liberty
she comes in
about once a week
a stars and stripes sunhat
on her pointed head
she asks the asian kids
if they’ve learned the difference
between their Ls and Rs yet
even though most of them
are more american
than clichéd slices of apple pie
she says, imagine having to give up
a whole section of book stores to spanish books
if they’d only learn the language, she sighs
she once sang the star-spangled banner
over a russian man who wanted a newspaper
asked him how
his good buddy, putin, was doing
she likes to fan herself with an american flag
and when she farts in line for the bathroom
it smells like freedom
in the shitter she belts out
america the beautiful
as she drops atomic bomb turds
into the toilet
before waddling her patriotic ass
back out into the sun
toilet paper caught in her pants
without even having the decency
to flush away her sovereignty.
and....one for bastille day
bastille day
then he said
in all seriousness
how do you impress a french girl?
to which i said
a lot of wine
some edith piaf
some serge gainsbourg
a little proust on the couch
and if that doesn’t work
show her your cock
while whistling yankee doodle dandy
reach for the butter
and tell her to bend over
mon cheri
because it’s bastille day
all day
just for her.
07.30.13
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