Wednesday, November 25, 2015

poem of the day 11.25.15

all i like to do is drink

which might be true
otherwise you wouldn’t have said it

i mean i don’t like many people
and i most likely don’t like children or dogs

i don’t like saying good morning or have a nice day

i don’t like going to work
or paying bills or paying rent
or spending over ten dollars for anything

i don’t like how low the minimum wage is
but i’m too lazy to try and change it

i don’t like restaurants with happy waitresses
hungering for a tip
and i no longer like going to bars

i don’t like the infirm
and i get nervous around the mentally handicapped

i don’t like car horns and traffic
i don’t like people walking up my ass on the street
construction work blocking my path

i don’t like parades and picnics
going to parks to stroll around on so-called beautiful days

i don’t like christmas or thanksgiving
and i fucking loath the fourth of july

i don’t like texting, the internet and cable tv
smartphones and video games and men that say bro

i want to strangle people who talk about art in art museums

i don’t like religion or the tenants of eastern thought
so you can have your jesus and allah and buddha and mickey mouse too

i don’t like capitalism, america or american flags
i don’t like exceptionalism and vanity and red states vs. blue

i really don’t like war all of the time
because while it makes some rich it just makes most others dead

that means i don’t like politicians talking like politicians
and i don’t like fascist charlatans telling me
that they’ll make america great again

so this means that i don’t like being lied to

you know that i don’t like racism or xenophobia
but i’ve had my dark moments of thought

i don’t like the sun and summer
and pop music blasting out of some asshole’s car
but i hate a fucker who’s pretentious about music

i don’t like warm weather when it’s supposed to be cool
or people who deny climate change

i don’t like watching football, soccer or hockey
or, for that matter, any millionaires playing games like kids

i don’t like onions on my pizza or anything else
light beer or coffee that’s too weak

i don’t like umbrellas or scarves

i don’t like genocide or murder
but i have a mental list of people i’d take out

i don’t like being a hypocrite

i don’t like alarm clocks or blockbuster films
the upstairs neighbor who’s always dropping shit

i don’t like a lot of poetry
but i’m a sucker for a great line

i don’t like him
and i don’t like her

i don’t like the mailman
and the kid who works the deli
the one who sighs when i want a pound of meat

all i like to do is drink, you say
well, i love you more than you know
more than you could possibly imagine

still i don’t like lulls in the conversation
and i hate to interrupt

but i don’t like it when my vodka glass is empty
so if you’ll excuse me for a moment…

i’ll be right back

because i don’t like it
when people don’t keep their promises

and i never like it
when i’m going to be late.


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