Tuesday, May 13, 2014

poem of the day 05.13.14

corn muffins

not all cops are assholes

i mean i’m sure there are
one or two good ones out there

anything is possible

the one here in the bagel store
standing midway down the line
blocking progress and playing on his gadget

while the rest of us fools line up behind him
and out the door

he’s definitely an asshole

eight in the morning on a sunday
with a hangover and the inability to sleep
all i want is a corn muffin
to go home and scald my tongue on coffee
laugh with the new york times

but it seems like everyone working here
is waiting on this cop

one of them is making his coffee
one of them is frying his eggs and nuking his bacon
one of them is toasting his everything bagel

he’s getting the full treatment
while the rest of us proles are getting leg cramps

and one of them is saying, yes, officer
and one of them is saying, sure, officer
and one of them is saying, whatever you need, officer

is your coffee all right, officer?
can the staff scratch your ass while you wait?

i wonder what the cop would do
if i vomited right on the bagel store floor

the baby faced prick
would probably arrest me
for disturbing the peace

or he’d take a picture of me with his phone
to show the other dickheads back at the precinct

and i can just see those corn muffins
sitting there encases in glass

i’m wondering why one of us just doesn’t
walk around him and demand service

why none of us will revolt

christ, the average citizen is even scared of the police
while trying to get breakfast

then i start thinking
maybe i don’t need a corn muffin
maybe today i’ll just take the hangover and the coffee
and all of the misery the new york times has to offer

but the cop finally gets his order

the entire bagel shop staff gather around
to hand him his coffee and his sandwich

officer friendly doesn’t even look up from his phone

he just takes his bag and leaves
with his cop pants wedged right up his cop ass

new york’s finest for sure

as the rest of us robots move up in the queue
to finally order all of those delicious things
we’ve waited so long for

everything that’ll just turn into shit
by the end of the day.


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