Saturday, July 22, 2017

day ONE HUNDRED and EIGHTY FOUR



Just Block Him

Just block him, you said.
I don’t understand, you said.

I know, I said.
I should.
It’s just.

Just what? Just block him.
He’s a troll.
He’s an idiot.
It’s just Twitter.
Just block him.

I know but
the thing is
I want to think
I can change him.
Can slowly dismantle
centuries of thinking
or worse
that if I don’t fight back
I’m letting down all the other
women who speak up
and talk about these things.
That we are tethered to fighting
like a ship at sea
trying to stay afloat in the tempest.
We have no choice.

Just block him, you said.
Do it. Otherwise I’m going
to say something.

I thought of all the arguments
all the articles to verify and link to
all the work to prove my humanity
to a human who thought
I was lucky things were the way they were
that they could be so much worse.

That starving was better than drowning
even though they both ended in death.

Alright, I said.
I’ll block him.
And I won’t think of it as quitting.

But when I logged in
it was already done
and he had blocked me

and I know he didn’t
not really
not in the big scheme kind of way
but truth be told
It sure feels like

he won.

--Ally Malinenko

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