don’t go to 9th
avenue
the sound of her shrill voice
pulls me right out of the frank o’hara
she says into her phone
why didn’t you pick up by the 2nd ring?
and i find myself looking at the cellulite
on the back of her high-kicking thigh
it’s not a judgment
it’s simply where my focus lands
instead of on the frank o’hara
oh, don’t give me that shit, she says
you’re supposed to be heading to 9th avenue
to pick up your son
because he’s been waiting for you all day, she says
i look away from the cellulite
to the boy standing on the orange plastic seat
watching dull brooklyn go by on the d train
he’s smiling
either clueless or like a buddhist
he just accept his life for what it is
if he’s smart he misses no one
that’s fuckin’ bullshit, she says
i mean what exactly are you doing?
it ain’t like you have a job
and now others are watching the evening show
i look into her face
haggard, too much eye make-up
i have no room to talk
today two separate people told me that i look like hell
and they were most likely right
she squints at me
i figure if i don’t turn away
i’m next on her hit list
but she’s like watching a car wreck
yeah, she says into her phone
well, you should’ve thought of that
when you knocked me up
and don’t take that tone with me, asshole, she shouts
her boy stops looking out the window
she turns to him and gives him an eskimo kiss
in twenty years he’ll be on the other end
of a phone call like this
then she says,
if you’re going to be like that
we can just go to my mother’s
we all wait on bated breath for his answer
what do you mean good? she shouts
look, i don’t give a shit
you just get your ass down to 9th avenue right
now
or i swear, anton, i fucking swear, she says
she hangs up the phone
before she can complete the threat
she grabs her standing kid and puts him in her lap
smothers him with kisses and future psychosis
while somewhere out there
anton is sweating bullets over 9th avenue
or he’s sitting back and cracking open another beer
happy with the buzz of silence
before the phone will ring again
and he has to suffer the cadence
of her wonderful, motherly voice.
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