yet the sun doesn’t
have
the courage to die
102 years old, she says to no one
my aunt, she says
she shakes the big picture she’s holding
only this isn’t her
this is my great-grandmother
she shows the whole bus her picture
my aunt died, she said
so i get this picture of great-grandma
wasn’t she beautiful?
didn’t we look alike?
a group of mexican day laborers
shake their heads in unison
muy hermosa, one shouts
before he goes back to sleeping in drywall dust
i’m sorry if i’m bothering you
she says, but i don’t know to who
but i’m very depressed
it’s hard going through somebody’s things
even if they died at 102 years old
even if you get to have this wonderful picture
she shows great-grandma around the bus again
and i got a jacket, she says
i got an old fur coat
i have it right in this bag here
but i’m very depressed, she says
it’s very depressing when someone dies
even though she had the courage to live 102 years
not many people can do that
how many people on this bus will see 102?
she looks around at the screaming kids
at the day laborers and tired mothers
at the girls singing along to songs
coming loudly off their cell phones
at the people trying to make it home from work
at a still reasonable hour
people who already look dead
didn’t we look alike? she says to me
she shows me the picture of her great-grandmother
of course she never saw 102, she says
not like my aunt
imagine that, she says to me
as i nod and turn away from the photo
to watch the sun as it starts to sink
behind one of the dull gray buildings lining the avenue
housing people who must
endure the rudiments of the day
for reasons they no longer understand
maybe for the few small moments of bliss
that come their way and make up a life
imagine 102 years and what that must feel like
all those years, she says to no one again
oh, it’s very depressing to talk about
oh, but this life, she says
it’s also such a miracle, right?
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