poem of the day 04.13.10

hungover on a bathroom floor in paris

hungover on a bathroom floor in paris
i have a headache and my stomach is burning
i have just thrown up wine and peanuts
from a night of debauchery at la rotonde
there is a tallboy of heineken in the refrigerator
it is half drunk and i don’t remember buying it
but my wife has a digital picture of me
holding the beer and leaning on some stranger’s scooter
with the le dome in the background
and rodin’s statue of balzac off to the right

i have been like this on many bathroom floors before
in pittsburgh, in new york, and in buffalo mostly
i’m not new to this
but this is my first international trip to give alms
to the porcelain god

i didn’t throw up in london

i don’t like this bathroom
the white tile feels warm on my skin instead of cold
and the sink has a mirror that wraps around it
so that i can see how black and blue my eyes look
how pale green my face is
how sweaty and matted my hair and beard are
my legs when i get the shits
i can see wine and peanuts on my t-shirt
i can see what an asshole i look like

hungover on bathroom floor in paris
the bile rising in me again
and the head pounding its too typical beat
a beautiful sunny day trip to the eiffel tower
probably wasted
because i wanted to die too much the night before

because i always want too much.