Rally of the Plastic Cheeto
(Sing to the tune of “Plastic Jesus” as you heard it in “Cool Hand Luke.” Thank you, Ernie Marrs.)
They don’t care that he lied and tricked ‘em,
mocked the hero and shamed the victim,
their Plastic Cheeto at the podium.
They didn’t listen to Dr. Ford;
She just scared ‘em with six-bit words,
but now they laugh and think they’re not so dumb.
Twenty-five dollars and they can buy a
MAGA hat that’s made in China.
A wreck is up ahead, but they don’t mind.
They don’t care if he scams and cheats ‘em.
Reasoned eloquence just defeats ‘em.
So let the carny barker rob ‘em blind.
Through our trials and tribulation,
he throws acid across our nation,
searing wounds that leave a lasting scar.
They don’t mind if he’s a big fat liar.
Think they’ve found their orange Messiah,
and with their plastic cheater they’ll go far.