Friday, September 27, 2013

poem of the day 09.27.13


i am
stalking celebrities online
to see how many of them beat their addictions

i want to know how bad it got
for some of them

in some cases it got real bad

i’m a guppy in comparison to some of these people
wrecking hotel rooms and cars
virtually destroying their careers

dying in many instances

i want to find the ones whose luck turned around
the ones who beat the years of abuse
then went on to greater glory

this is so fucking silly of me

no one would really care if my habit took me under
i’d be just another third-rate hack

catapulted off the planet by his own demons
before he made a dent

another aging asshole racing against the clock
who though he could give a little something to this world

until the drink got him

the paper probably wouldn’t even mention writing
in my obituary

or if i bounced back and wrote three novels in a row
in one sweaty jag of sobriety

it wouldn’t make a difference to the internet masses

i’d probably still be sitting in a jail cell
if i got fucked up and broke into someone’s house

instead of winning oscars
and making super hero films for millions of dollars

sucking dick instead of the mouths of tallboy cans

i don’t even know why
i’m stalking these celebrities online

trying to draw comparisons
between their hard luck and mine

i don’t have anything in common with these people

like fleets of lawyers
and day spa rehab facilities

i have going cold turkey and trying to punch a wall

i don’t have a chauffer
to drive me around los angeles
until my cravings subside

i can’t even get an agent to read my shit

i just have this ten year-old kid on the bus
who keeps hitting me in the ass
with his iron man doll

while i’m three days sober and ready to burst

i fantasize about throwing him out a window
and into the high speeding traffic

then stopping on the way home
for whiskey with beer chasers at froth’s saloon

watching the celebrity news on channel five

until the cops and photogs catch up with me
and i can finally see how the other half lives.


No comments: