Friday, August 8, 2014

poem of the day 08.08.14

my phone call with larry

i was feeling idle
arguing with schopenhauer in my head
about what constitutes original thought
when the phone rings at my desk

kid, larry says, it’s me

noon and i could already tell that he was
three sheets to the wind

you like cheap scotch and i like cheap cognac
but let’s not make this about us, he says

okay, i tell him

i wanna talk
i wanna talk about those israeli motherfuckers
and those palestinian pricks

larry says, i want you to know that women aren’t worth it
believe me when i say that a piece of ass is fleeting at best

he says, i’m no racist
but everyone at the food stamp office ain’t white
and that president we have shouldn’t even be president
not because he’s black
but because he was only a two-term senator

we should’ve elected that broad, larry says
what’s her name?

clinton, i answer

yeah, her.  at least her old man was president
he did it two times, larry says

he was good at two-timing, i say

larry doesn’t laugh
he just says, so you think you’re a comedian now
you need to drink more cheap scotch and i need more cognac
then he stops for a drink

if i’ve learned anything in this world, he says
it’s that i’ve learned nothing except that everything is misery

i wonder if larry is reading philosophy too

he says, this ain’t no life, kid
two divorces and medical bills
a daughter who wants a tummy tuck
and breast augmentation surgery at thirty-five

larry says, i mean what the fuck?

i don’t know, i tell him

two rooms and a shared bathroom, he says
food stamps and government handouts at my age

larry says, this is why i get lost in movies
in the old ones and in the new ones
i’d rather live in a film than drive these ugly streets

he says, if it weren’t for my grandkids
i’d buy a gun and do myself in
i’d take some motherfuckers with me, you know?

things are tough all over, larry, i tell him

you just drink your scotch, he says
and i’ll drink my cheap cognac

he stops for another drink

he says, you still there?

yeah, larry, i say

i’m at my job
larry knows that he has me until six

good, he says
you see, i went to the doctor the other day
and he says

he seems to think
that it’s something about my liver, kid

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