Saturday, October 3, 2020


Coming Soon. . . 

Coming soon to your local school gymnasium is the fight
of a lifetime. Yes, it’s for the United States Championship
Belt, and you, yes, you will have a say.

The current champions, are The Donalds, a father-son combo,
two-dimensional cartoon characters, dark and damaged
who would wear Klan robes if television permitted.

Orange faced Big Donald, the Gorgeous George of his day,
carries a mirror and applies make up wherever he goes, and Little
Donald longs for the love and affection his father. This duo

Was trained by the great glamorpuss of wrestling Vince McMahon
and the true villain of the 21st century Vlad “The Shirtless Horseman” Putin.
The Donalds have enjoyed a spectacular rise through their cunning

Use of outrage and cheating, since everyone knows they carry
foreign objects in their tights to gauge their opponents’ eyes.
They won by following the script, since pro wrestling is rigged.

Considered in wrestling terms as “the heel,” The Donalds
have gathered a vociferous MAGA red-hat wearing following
who relishes being contrarian or identifies with the Q-Anon

inspired conspiracy theories instead of science or just enjoy
being angry racists. Now as the Donalds prep for the upcoming
Big Battle on November 3, they hold their champion-.

Ship belts high before a mask-less audience huddled
together like it was 2019. Standing in the center of the ring
Big Donald takes microphone. He raises his hand to silence

The crowd. He takes a sip of water holding the glass in one hand.
Like true heels, The Donalds tell the world how great they are
And how their law and order will conquer this menacing world.

The Donalds take turns spewing invectives against anyone
who fights for fairness and justice. They call soldiers losers
They call teachers losers. The protestors are losers.

Those not rooting for them to win are losers. The Donalds
call the press fake and disavow science. Women are nasty.
They remind everyone about the Big Battle on November 3rd.

There will be over 200,000 plus people who won’t be in attendance.
Neither will Breonna Taylor.
Or George Floyd. 

--Tom Lagasse  

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