Friday, November 8, 2013

poem of the day 11.08.13

lazy river

my parents didn’t have a pot to piss in
for the longest time

but the family caught a lucky streak
around the time that i hit twelve or thirteen
and we were able to go on vacations for a few years

like normal, white, middle-class americans

we went this one time to sea world and geauga lake
to see the captive orcas and other trapped sea creatures
put on shows for us and eat chum
and daydream an open sea they’d never have again

while we clapped along with all of the other
normal, white, middle-class american families

across the way at geauga lake
there was this big amusement park with water slides
and water rides and all of these other rides
that kept the white middle-class american families
half-naked in the ohio heat of july

but i was twelve or thirteen or maybe fourteen
well aware of girls and hot young women in bikinis
their tits and the strands of pubic hair
hanging out the sides of their bikini bottoms

well aware of the fact that i was massively overweight
and that i had a pregnant lady stretch marks
on my stomach and arms

that there was no way in hell
i was going around some amusement park
half naked in the ohio heat with my fat, white
stretch marked stomach on display for every
hot girl or young woman in a bikini to see

no matter how much my old man paid to get me in

so i found this thing called the lazy river
which was just a grooved tunnel that went around the park

it filtered through about three to four feet of water
just enough to float on with rafts
or on your back or fat belly like i did (in a t-shirt of course)

the lazy river was full of old ladies and men
or women with their infants and toddlers

it was a good place for me to hide
from the girls and young women in bikinis
from the embarrassment of being twelve or thirteen
with stretch marks and a double chin

but every so often someone would find me
my dad or my mom
my brother or our family friends

they’d try to get me to come out of the lazy river
to go on the water slides or wave pools

but i knew there’d be girls in bikinis on those rides

thin, white, middle-class american girls
with their long legs and tight asses
with their beautiful smiles and diamond eyes
who’d want nothing to do with me and my fat

so i stayed where i was in the lazy river
floating along with grandmothers and great aunts

even though everyone thought  that i was just
being a moody kid in the ohio heat

even though i heard my old man complaining to my mom
all about the money they’d spent getting me into the amusement park

how i was old enough to stay alone back at the hotel
if i was going to be like that

where i could sit on my ass and watch tv
a tv most likely full of girls and young women in bikinis
with smooth porcelain skin and shining blue eyes

females who were real enough for me to touch
and maybe talk to

but not quite.

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