Thursday, June 30, 2016

poem of the day 06.30.16

time to change liquor stores again

these are temporary loves
you should know this by now, i think

but dusting off the embers of these trysts
gets harder and harder with each separation

on any block i pass the dusty visages
of old dalliances gone bad in a sudden twist of fate

an indiscretion here that become too intimate
anger and judgement pushed too far

a price that became too expensive
for my loyalty and trust

or really just hanging around
much longer than i realized
my welcome was wanted

today he wants to discuss rebates
all next week eight dollars off smirnoff

an inane pillow talk that i’ve suffered before
for the sake of the relationship

the drill is to smile and act interested
the way that old couples do
when they tell each other the same story yet again

interject an oh yes, and hmmmm, there and there
while keeping hold of that familiar plastic bottle
as if he were waiting to grip ol’ faithful from my hands

i think of how it used to be when this all started

silent judgment that was easy to tolerate
the cold cash exchange at the register
not unlike a backseat transaction with a whore

how i long for those days
the ones before the hellos and goodbyes
the good afternoons and how was your day, honey

those extra hits from pourer girls
on wine and whiskey tasting fridays
that we never made mention of by monday

but we’ll never get back to that now
we’ve come too far with this

all my relationships have died
the minute they expect me to change

yet like a fool he’ll expect me here all next week

obedient and dedicated like the most beaten of dogs
the way the others have done in the past

but i’m nobody’s slave

i’ve left bigger and better in the dust
over as little as a crossed eye and a torn plastic bag

and there’s this new kid on the block
only five minutes out of my way

a giant grand opening sign in the window
and a face behind the register

blank and unfamiliar, an empty vessel
who knows nothing about me

with whom i can be free
or anyone i want to be…for now.


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